couple days

The past couple days have been pretty good! (even though I haven't had a computer) I thought I was going to be SO bored without it but I've actually got a LOT done. Yesterday I got up with Bailey and at breakfast then we went and played outside! She looooves being outside in the grass, she just runs around with the biggest grin! But then, I was staring at the fountain in the pond and I turned to look at Bailey and she was sitting down grabbing her legs.....ants! It wasn't bad, there was probably only 4 or 5 on her and she only got 2 bites but it was so sad! She didn't cry, I think she was just confused but..we went inside after that so I could take her clothes off and check for more. She's so precious to me. I love this age...I love when I tell her to do something and I can see her thinking and processing it in her little mind and she does it! Like "Go get that block and bring it to Aunt Brit!" She does it with such excitement! I love that little girl! right now she's watching My Friends Tigger and Pooh and occasionally coming to get bites of oatmeal from Mommy :-)

Today, we're going to hang around the house and pick up a little bit and eat lunch, then we're going to Aunt Jenny's so I can pick up Kendall's algebra notes then come back home and THEN I have to go to work from 5-9. Not bad, but my job is a big joke! I'm a "receptionist" but its at a retirement home so someone has to be at both desks 24/7. from 8-9 it's receptionists and from 9-8 it's security guards. But I usually work evening or weekends and there is absolutely nothing to do work-wise so I usually just bring a book or draw or write in complete silence! Sometimes the little 4 hours shifts are nice but when I have to work 8-5, I kinda wanna go crazy because I feel like I'm wasting my time and I just want to be home with my sweet Bailey. I'm with her all the time..I don't know what I'm gonna do when I start nursing school, full time. I can't put her in daycare....well...I WONT but her in daycare. So I'm going to have to go to night classes and just work my butt off because she'll be 2 by then. SIGH...life is going to be hard for a little while but I KNOW I can do it. I trust God that everything will work out for the best.. He has a plan for all of us and I know it's a good one!

Well I think that's gonna be it for now, I've got to finish feeding Bailey girl her oatmeal and makes some more coffee for MEEE!! IF anyone's reading this...have a lovely day

surprise surprise!

Well, I thought today was going to be horrible! I thought I was going to be stuck at home with no computer, I thought it was going to be rainy and cold! But...I woke up in the happiest mood, ready for the day even if it was boring and lonely--fortunately it's GORGEOUS outside, I got the chance to run a few errands and now I'm home waiting for my silly girl to get sleepy and take a nap so I can clean up and start dinner! I love being able to stay home with her :) Thank you God for a family that supports and loves me. THOUGHT-- I have GOT to get Bailey a puppy..and soon. She's about to drive our 15 year old chihuahua nuts. She chases him around with her little wonderpets car nonstop! Poor Bandit!

Anyway, I think that's all for now! I have a few things so do but...

Here's a video of my funny girl...

No direction, just talk

What inspires me? People. People who are genuinely happy with their own lives. Bailey inspires me tremendously...she's the happiest person I know! ha-ha!! A couple weeks ago, on facebook, someone posted something like"Your baby always looks like the happiest kid in the world" and that was the best compliment EVER! That's all I want. :) Bailey was like my push into a new life...She motivates me daily, just by smiling and laughing. Motherhood is so weird though...pregnancy and childbirth are even weirder! When I think about it, it seems so SciFi..like alien-ish. A little human grows inside another human until it's perfectly ready to survive in the crazy world...God is awesome. I don't know how atheists do it..like it seems pretty far fetched to believe we came from nothing. Everything fits too perfectly to be chance. When I took Anatomy and Physiology I, it seriously just reinforced my beliefs in God. Studying the human body down to the tiniest cell is crazy...everything has a purpose. A-M-A-Z-I-N-G!

Anyway, back to motherhood being weird. When I was pregnant, I knew I was going to love Bailey but I didn't understand it really, I still don't understand this overflowing love. It's loving someone so much it hurts...like love that makes you want to laugh, scream, cry, hug and kiss all at the same time. There's so much I want to teach her:

-I don't even want her to have a racist pinky! I want her to know that God created us all equally and skin color is just another one of those tiny differences between each person, like eye or hair color. I want her to love everyone the way Jesus loves us.

-I want her to have good manners. Too often I meet people who just have no manners...or I've had friends/people over who don't say PLEASE or THANK YOU or MA'AM to my mom or grandma. It's crazy..I guess some people my age or younger don't think it's important but I was raised to have good manners and I think people appreciate it. It really does show respect. That's another thing, I want Bailey to be respectful of everyone..not just grown ups, but everyone. We all deserve respect!

-I want her to love her body and be healthy. This is kind of one of those lead by example things, but I just want her to realize how important it is to take care of yourself.

What else.. I want her to be a hard worker, a lover not a fighter, dedicated, and strong-willed. I want her to love God with all her heart and share that love with people around her. I want her to always keep her future in mind but ALWAYS live for the day. Most of all, I want her to know how loved she is. She's an amazing child and I know to make all this happen it's going to take prayer and a lot of work on my part to be a great example for her. I will always be here for her, I want her to know that too.

all about decisions

I've decided that this blog is HEREBY dedicated and all about my precious daughter. I decided this, because we started off the day pretty bad this morning. Bailey pulled down the laptop and broke the screen completely (I'm on my sister's computer right now.) But anyway, I got so sad because I realized all her pictures were on there and while I'm sure I can take the hard drive to the Geek Squad and get all my pictures it just made me think I need to start keeping some kind of journal with pictures because if anything every happened I would lose all my memories!

Soo, here we go! We woke up earlier than normal today to go to church but we ended up not going because of the computer catastrophe which I know is no excuse for missing church. But sometimes when you have a bad morning it kinda just throws off the whole day!! Church probably would've helped me a lot because I was so upset after that happened but what can ya do! Up until about an hour ago I was in such a bad mood but I got Bailey to take a nap and just sat and THUNK (yes, thunk) and I was like "okay caity... re-adjust your attitude because being mad all day is NOT gonna be fun for you, Bailey, or anyone!" So, I made myself get over it because I'm not wasting time being a grump-grump. Now Bailey girl is up from her nap standing about a foot in front of the TV watching Nick! She was in a Tinkerbell chair but apparently that wasn't close enough!

And oh my gosh!! God is GOOD! I was so bummed out about my pictures and everything but after I got over it, I got my camcorder out and took a few pictures of Bailey and just put the memory card in the computer to upload them and to MY SURPRISE...I never deleted any of my pictures off the memory card so it's uploading about 500 pictures to my sister's computer right now! WOW! How awesome is that! Thank you Jesus! I know it may seem silly, but I think God works in funny ways sometimes. Like if I'm in a hurry or something and I find a close parking space I'm always "Thank You God! You are so awesome!" I mean, of course we thank God for big things, everything, good and bad. But I think it's so awesome when little things like that happen, it always reminds me that God's there and he's looking out for us is big and small ways :)

my babydoll when she was about 2 weeks old. 4.5lbs

my precious little today! watching cartoons, 16 months old!